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Sadness

You know.. this has come back to bite me a couple of times, so I’m just going to have to write about it here, to ‘get it off my chest’.

I read this verse out at a workshop in NZ earlier this year, and now I kinda wish I didn’t, (although if I trust that all is well really, noone need ever take on anything I say if it doesn’t resonate with them.. and everything happens for a reason.. blah blah blah), but I think the point is, I’d hate to think I’d put more shit on someone that they already had going on for themselves.

So… ok.. I’m feeling uncomfortable about it.. and I’d like to fix it. Maybe that’s not entirely possible.

The verse I read out was this one ”

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, “My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.

“One is Evil – It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.

“The other is Good – It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: “Which wolf wins?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

And… with all due respect to that Cherokee elder… I don’t think anger is evil!… and neither is ego for that matter… or even sorrow…

so… as much as I believe there to be an inner critic inside most of us that will drive us to crazy town in a heartbeat… it’s not EVIL to have human emotions.. it’s more what we do with those emotions that can become a problem.

Self awareness is.. realising emotions come up.. and I attach a meaning to them.. but if I take a breath.. pause and be with the feeling for a moment/or several… there is usually something going on behind it… and rather than be so reactionary … I can allow the emotion to tell me what’s up..  and what is truly going on here.

so.. maybe it’s between the critic and the muse… and I can choose which one I listen to the most… mind you… ‘sometimes’ the critic is also just trying to help… unfortunately though, it most often has a really bitchy way of doing so.

So… dear ones who were there that day.. especially if this upset you in any way,

I’m sorry.

love, Denise x

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