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~ wonderings from an artist's soul

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Tag Archives: courage

A Most Painful Question for an Artist

20 Monday Feb 2017

Posted by Denise Daffara in being an artist, critic, Denise Daffara Art

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Art, blogging, celebration, courage, creativity, embarrassing, exhibition, faith, inspiration, life, living, selling art, sharing

denise-daffara-2017

I sat in my lounge the other day as it was filled with over 70 pieces of my artwork, I’d opened it up to have an Art Sale over the weekend. This felt like both a brave and an embarrassing act of faith and courage.

Hanging the works in one space gave me a jolt of recognition that ‘many of these are the ones that remain’, and where to from here?  It also became quite confronting for me and perhaps if I be kind, a celebration.

I was more than grateful that several pieces sold, the financial support of that is really helpful.

 

dd-beginnings

Audio … ‘podcast’ kind of recording.  vimeo link : https://vimeo.com/204308171

As I mention in this audio, one of the most painful questions I still ‘come up against’ is “Did you sell any paintings?” It’s obviously not the question in and of itself, it’s about what I make it mean.

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three-faves

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I’m not looking for platitudes or wanting to take up full time residence in victim mode here, I’m simply aiming curiosity at an aspect of ‘being an artist’ that can really suck. I wonder why this question is seemingly the first one to roll of someones’s tongue.

I don’t think many other workers of pretty much any kind are asked this.

What other questions/things might one say . . .

  • How did it feel having a room filled with your creativity on the wall and people staring at them?
  • Tell me about your favourite piece in this collection.
  • Can I tell you about the one I liked the best?
  • I was most moved by . . .
  • This one made me think of . . .

Before you ask that question of an artist . . . pause . . . what is it you’re really asking, and is there a way you can connect in a new way.

What happens when something goes from being an expression of feelings and emotions and colour.. onto the canvas . . . to an item or product for sale. Can we / I the artist divorce myself from that process? Can I make it less of an issue of success or failure.

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This is on my mind again, will I do the dance to create for the love of it, if it sells – celebrate the exchange. If it does not sell – celebrate the freedom to paint again, paint some more, paint over any I/you choose to.

I speak a bit more about all of this in a ‘podcast’ kind of ‘innerview‘ thing above that my partner and I recorded Thurs 16 Feb 2017.

I feel I live right in the middle of the paradox. Wanting to paint for the love of it, needing to have financial exchange for my work in some way shape or form . . . if not from making art, perhaps from other creative projects. This year is all about making changes that bring me more into alignment with what I’m meant to be doing here.

Making a living from ones art – this seems to be quite an issue of contention. Reading Big Magic by Liz Gilbert I came up HARD against her words “I don’t make my creativity pay the rent”.

So, I believe I am still in the thick of this inquiry, I am not seeking answers from without so much as from within, but open to sharing a piece of the process with you here. I suspect I am not alone in this quest to make peace with how I/we stay true to the creative spirit within whilst finding authentic, doable ways of ‘making a living’.

Before you ask that question of an artist . . . pause . . . what is it you’re really asking, and is there a way you can connect in a new way.

Denise x

ps. It’s been over a week since the art sale, I’ve decided to remove several of the paintings from their stretchers and let them go. Already I feel an ease when I look at the smooth pine frames without any canvas stretched upon them, they wait patiently to have a new beginning, and hold a new possibility for me. I’ve also started to paint over a selection of them that are ‘done’. I may share some of them in a future blogpost soon. D x

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Mother Love : an invitation to circle

29 Thursday Sep 2016

Posted by Denise Daffara in Circle online, Creativitea, mother

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Tags

circle, courage, creativitea, gather, mother, Mother Love, relationship, safe space

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I’m ‘flying by the seat of my pants again’ (in an imaginary red cape, wearing red shoes) . . . and have made the committment to step in to the next offering, I’m feeling pulled to bring out into the world.

It’s called Mother Love, and by that it can be in whatever way you need to immerse yourself in that energy for a 12 week focused time within a group/circle opportunity.

Whether you are grieving the loss of your Mother, or loss of relationship, a difficult relationship, a long distance relationship, exhausted by the desire to be a Mother and it hasn’t happened yet, relating to your own way of showing up as Mother… indeed… Mothering ourselves.. and some I know have a deep relationship with the Divine Mother.

I will be holding the space of facilitator of circle gatherings on Zoom… every 2 weeks during the 12, with a 2 week break over Christmas and New Year time.

(starting 26 October 2016 – 18 January 2017)

safe-space-dd

There will be video’s of art journal pages and prompts, conversations and innerviews about what Mother Love means to some of the women in my life, ideas and possibilities – freshly made so they meet us where we are – in this ‘time space continuum’ lol …. reminding me of that crazy Back to the Future movie.

. . . anyhow, dear heart if you seek a soft place to explore some of your Mother Love story… you are welcome, this will be a gentle and kind space, nurturing and I hope nourishing. I am feeling the desire to bring in some kind of ‘hand stitching’ as well.

I’ll share the first video I made in relation to my thoughts behind it’s creation… and on the website you will find another couple of video samples of how I share this work.

 

and a link to the website page for Mother Love, eCourse Circle offering is here.

 

Mother Love is Boundless.

My Mother died earlier in the year, I seek a deep understanding of what I need to know now as a grown woman, and Mother to myself and my two daughters.

I now have space and time to notice what parts of my Mother Love story are life giving in their tenderness? What parts want to be put to rest? Where does it hurt?

I can open my heart to be shown these, I can open my heart to receive the memories that I can hold safe now and bring Grace to the child in me.

I may ask my Grand Mothers’ of generations past.

Show me the legacy, show me what is mine to birth into this world, now that they are beyond the bounds of their human constraints to offer me support in ways I do not fully understand.

~ Denise Daffara

 

much love Denise xx

March Here

03 Thursday Mar 2016

Posted by Denise Daffara in being an artist, Creativitea, denise daffara art

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

asipofmytea, courage, eat pray love, grace, loss, love, paleo, pancakes, protein, tea, veil

I have a number of painting in progress at the moment, readying for a group exhibition in Brisbane early April. This both freaks me out and excites me in kindof equal measure.

Below is where one is currently at… and two preceding stages of it . . . I’m painting over one I did last year and was no longer attached to keeping.

 

Image3

imageOne
Image2

 

Letting go

I’m learning a lot about letting go . . . which is pertinent to me in more ways than one at the moment.. in the space of time since I last visited this blog and posted . . . I have travelled to New Zealand twice to visit my Mother and our family.. and in January our dear Mother died, I had the privilage of being with her for the days leading up to her departure and the bittersweet moment of her last breath.

So much cannot be said when regaling the complex relationship between mother and daughter, but suffice to say she taught me so much about grace and presence especially in her last days with us, she gave of herself so generously, I can learn much still from my memories of her, and also too, I am learning to let some of the old practices she was given by outdated systems go, they are not necessarily mine to keep even if they were passed down from generations.

I am aware that a new relationship will be ours now as I believe she is just across the veil.

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Blessed be : A Patricia Fahey 9th May 1929 − 18th January 2016

A very special priest cared for us and our Mother during this time of grief and loss, Fr Phil left an indelable mark on our hearts as he gave us a glimpse of a beautiful man of faith with so much humility and grace and immense kindness. He cycled around to my parents home and left an envelope for me on the afternoon of Mum’s funeral, inside it on a piece of paper was written :

Cup of Tea

Drink your tea slowly and reverently,

as if it is the axis on which the whole earth revolves

slowly,

evenly,

without rushing toward the future;

Live the actual moment.

Only this moment is life.

– Thich Nhat Hanh

courage tea

On a practical note . . . I’ve been needing to keep strength up, and a dear friend reminded me of the benefits of a higher protein intake to give more energy.

So, here I will share the pancake mix I made this morning, I did the milling of the nuts and oats in a thermomix, but any device you have is worth a try.

High protein pancakes ~ almost paleo, but not quite

highproteinpancakesp pancake

kindof a bit ‘eat, pray, love’ over here today, I have been listening again to some Liz Gilbert and Brene Brown, and passed on the goodies of their books to my partner via kindle.

This morning, while doing the dishes, this video of Elizabeth Gilbert was great company. I love her. very. much. and am so grateful for her passionate voice in our social media world.

 

bye for now  dear reader,

 

love,  Denise x

 

Hearing news that stops you in your tracks.

11 Tuesday Aug 2015

Posted by Denise Daffara in Creativitea

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

asipofmytea, courage

Hello friend I maybe haven’t met,

I just read an email and blog from SARK.. Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy, she spoke of her deepest fear and greatest blessing… her Partner has received a cancer diagnosis, and so they are travelling that big path right now.

I was gobsmacked at the honesty and openness with which Susan shared their current life experience.

I am stopped in my tracks momentarily by it . . .  I count Susan as one of my dearest Role Models, I did an e-course with her in 2011 that helped change my life in a bright new direction. Obviously she’s still one of my dearest role models, and after reading her blog, I am even more grateful to have been led to her in the first place.

Having people like this in my life, via books, shows, blogs… wow. It’s incredible to me how much they impact by their sharing of their truth, their experience.

Thank you dear Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy for being so much of a lazer beam of love. (that’s her words, her life purpose : “which is to be a transformer, uplifter and laser beam of love.”)

If you want to read Susan’s blogpost for yourself, this is the link.

I’m not even sure why I wanted to blog this as such, but I felt I wanted to say something out loud.

This is a little drawing I made this morning as I was feeling all bent out of shape about something that I made myself upset about.

That’s another gift from SARK . . . the gift of drawing like no-one is judging, and being free to draw my inner child in this way brings me a freedom I didn’t used to allow myself.

ct inner child SEENwith heart,

and deep respect for those who are being with very hard to be with news and diagnosis’.

love Denise x

creativitea time the ecourse

11 Sunday Jan 2015

Posted by Denise Daffara in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

art journal, courage, creativitea, self care, self love, tea, teatime

creativiteatime.com

click image to visit website also.

Dearest one,

I’ve been working toward offering my own ecourse for quite a long while, and finally it’s coming to fruition. I’ll be addressing such things as the inner critic and self doubt, because to be honest they have been instumental in my taking A COUPLE OF YEARS to get bold enough, brave enough, and enough YES i CAN do this… so.. i totally GET the challenge of the artful life.

I won’t labour over those things though, because I also believe where you focus there you go.  So some helpful intentional creativity recipes will be shared, and the creation of a smash book / or several.

Please visit the info page to find out all the details, and don’t hesitate to ask a question if you have one.

Find out more over here : http://creativiteatime.com

thank you for stopping by,

love Denise.

5 cups of intentional creativitea for when you feel like $%*#

15 Tuesday Jul 2014

Posted by Denise Daffara in Creativitea, denise daffara art, Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

artist, blocked, courage, creating, creativitea, creativity, cups, inspiration, Muse, nurturing, self love, support, wise self

I found these written down in my journal…. they’re not new,

they’re simple.. but they really made a difference in my life when I was

feeling very much like a ‘blocked artist’

and on the days.. moments that shit feeling hangs about,

these are some of my ‘go to’ helpful things.

1cupIntentionalCreativitea

2cupintentionalCreativitea

3cupIntentionalCreativitea

4cupintentionalCreativitea

5CupintentionalCreativitea

love Denise xo

Image

courage to create

30 Friday May 2014

Tags

courage, paint, soul

courage to create

The thing (think / thought) I have to remember :
It doesn’t matter what other people think of me …
It matters what I think of me.

It matters what you think of you.

I wrote more on my other blog today .. but if you’d like to read it… link is here.

love Denise x

 

 

Posted by Denise Daffara | Filed under denise daffara art, Uncategorized

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After a day with two dental appts I needed to soothe my nervous system... Learning new techniques with @tracyverdugo brought me a peaceful way to do this with inks. #drawlikenooneisjudging #play #softcamp #soothe #nervoussystem #abstractmojo #heron

Denise Daffara Art

Denise Daffara Art

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